Thankful for today.

Yesterday morning, I had the opportunity to see a man I really respect and who I haven't seen for a year. It was really good. Mostly, I just listened and laughed as he shared stories about life. I think that's one reason I really respect him. He's so honest and so passionate about following the Lord. He has run towards what God has put in front of him, and as continued onward even though the road isn't always easy to tread. After talking with him, I realized just how discouraged I've allowed myself to become about the dreams and passions I have heald for many years, and in many ways have begun to give up on them. Ryan said that he thinks that someday I will go, and I want to believe that is true. Maybe it's all just part of the process of making us more like Christ. When we are at the point of giving up, of letting go, we have to reexamine our lives and the situation we find ourselves in. What are we rooted in? Where does our faith stand? I believe all of this has been part of solidifying my faith in what is true even when everything seems so out of control. And perhaps it is also that God wants me to become trained as a nurse in preparation for the work he has before me, allowing for more doors to be opened to be Christ to others.
Today, I am thankful for the process. Today, I am thankful for friends and how God uses them. Today, I am thankful for another day to experience more of who Christ is, more of what is true and right. Today I bow my heart and knees to the One who deserves our all....

In Process....

So, what now? Apparently Slovenia is not what God has for me right now, and seeing as going back to school was what I was intent on doing should this Slovenia thing not work out, why am I not seriously headed in that direction? I know I don't want to be doing the job I'm doing forever, but why am I just sitting here? I wish I could be more pinpointed in the direction I'm supposed to go. What I really want is to be married to a man who is strong in ministry who I can support. Apparently though, that isn't what God has for me right now either. So, shouldn't I be excited at the prospect of finding a new field of work? Where should I focus my attention? What is it that God is trying to teach me through this process?