Peace

There are moments when I find it easier to allow my thoughts to get away with me and even cause worry rather than just resting in peace, realizing that the One who has control does a better job of orchestrating everything than I do, and His way is always good, right, and loving.
If you haven't picked up on it yet, I am greatly encouraged and challenged by the words of Oswald Chambers. Words have always had a way of touching deep in my heart and soul, and mean a lot to me. Praise be to God that we have hope in Him and through His amazing love story that He wrote and lives out in pursuing the one He loves...us.
Being so encouraged once again by the words of another, I pass those along to those who are willing to listen.

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ARE YOU EVER DISTURBED? - Oswald Chambers
"Peace I leave with you, My peace I give unto you." John 14:27
There are times when our peace is based upon ignorance, but when we awaken to the facts of life, inner peace is impossible unless it is received from Jesus. When Our Lord speaks peace, He makes peace, His words are ever "spirit and life." Have I ever received what Jesus speaks? "My peace I give unto you" - it is a peace which comes from looking into His face and realizing His undisturbedness.
Are you painfully disturbed just now, distracted by the waves and billows of God's providential permission, and having, as it were, turned over the boulders of your belief, are you still finding no well of peace or joy or comfort; is all barren? Then look up and receive the undisturbedness of the Lord Jesus. Reflected peace is the proof that you are right with God because you are at liberty to turn your mind to Him. If you are not right with God, you can never turn your mind anywhere but on yourself. If you allow anything to hide the face of Jesus Christ from you, you are either disturbed or you have a false security.
Are you looking unto Jesus now, in the immediate matter that is pressing and receiving from Him peace? If so, He will be a gracious benediction of peace in and through you. But if you try to worry it out, you obliterate Him and deserve all you get. We get disturbed because we have not been considering Him. When one confers with Jesus Christ the perplexity goes, because He has no perplexity, and our only concern is to abide in Him. Lay it all out before Him, and in the face of difficulty, bereavement and sorrow, hear Him say, "Let not your heart be troubled."

We can take Him at His word.

Jesus replied, "You're right that you only have my word. But you can depend on it being true. I know where I've come from and where I go next. You don't know where I'm from or where I'm headed. You decide according to what you can see and touch. I don't make judgments like that. But even if I did, my judgment would be true because I wouldn't make it out of the narrowness of my experience but in the largeness of the One who sent me, the Father. John 8:15-16 (The Message)

God is faithful and true, and we can take Him at His word. If Jesus is in fact who He says He is, if He did what the Father did and told him to do in His holiness and glory, and if we are to follow the example of Jesus in our everyday living, than our decision making process will be dramatically different. Rather than basing our lives on what we experience, good and bad, we would respond to life based on the largeness of the Father, who is right and true, good and loving in all His ways. We can take Him at His word, and we can trust Him to be all that He is, the Great I AM, in our lives as well.

Mt. Tabor Pictures

Control

One day, a few days prior to today, God and I walked along the streets in Portland. We talked about life with each step taken. God showed me areas of my life where I struggle for control. It was a bit shocking to me as I don't see myself in that light. When I think of people with control issues I think of those who drive and have to be in front of another car, or yell to make their point clear. I think of those who have to have the last word in arguments. So to see a way in which I attempt to control my life without even realizing it cognitively on the front of my mind is something new to me. God gave me the ability to love people and to encourage. I don't take that lightly. However, God shined his light on how I at times use that to cause people to respond in a certain way. When you come right down to it, it could be seen in the light of a sort of manipulation. Usually, I'd say that my intentions were sincere, but there are definite times when I am looking to provoke a certain response in people. The problem is motive. Not only that, but people don't always receive what I give to be in the light of an offering of love as it was meant. People have different love languages, and even if you speak to them in that language, too much can prove to be a bad thing.
The theme of the week was exactly that. Control, seeing that I do in fact have issues with that even though I thought it wasn't a problem for me, and beginning to learn what it looks like to let go.
As I got up this morning, an inspiring thought crossed my mind. What if I could get Sarge, my dad's boxer, to pull me on my skateboard? That could be a fun adventure! I continued to get ready for church after envisioning this situation. The service this morning was on the same topic I have been working through this week, and was based off the scripture of James 4:1-12.
"God, you've shown me where I need to let go. So what does that look like?" I asked.
After church, I grabbed my longboard, and my camera, and headed over to my parents house to see if their dog just might be willing to pull me along. It worked! And it was fantastic fun!!
When I got home, I ate my lunch and then headed out on another walk with God around NE Portland. After only a couple of blocks of listening for the voice of God, He spoke to me and answered the question that I had earlier at church. Letting go of trying to have control over areas of my life, and allowing Him to take the lead is like being pulled along by Sarge. We just hold on and go for the ride. Sure we have to move the board under us to miss rocks and cracks in the pavement, but the driving force in our movement is the one in front of us. If we have our hands holding on to something else, such as a heavy ball and chain, while trying to keep balance as we're heading forward, the weight of trying to hold on to something we weren't meant to slows us down and causes unnecessary problems.
If we try to just control our direction and every situation that came across our path, instead of just allowing our selves to go with the One who knows the way, we would soon find ourselves either lost, worn out from exhaustion, or both. However, if we allow our Guide, who already has the terrain marked out, take full leadership we can just go along for the ride and the adventure, finding joy in doing so.
When I think about it, I find it ironic that we, that I would in fact fight for any sort of control. It is like saying that my way is the best, when I don't even know the way to go, or how to find fulfillment in pleasure, in life. Even if I should find a road that would give me temporary control and happiness, it leaves me longing for more. It's a hell of sorts. Having a passion and desire that can never be fully met, and yet not letting go to find that we can have everything we've ever hoped for by humbly giving up control.
God gave the answer to the question at hand. How do we let go and let Him? By just holding on to the cord that connects us to our Master, planting our feet on the wheels that move us forward in faith, and allowing God to fill our hearts, minds, and lives with fulfillment as He takes the control that ultimately belongs to Him anyway. We don't know where we're going. He does.
"What matters is to listen to [God], to let ourselves be guided, to face up to the adventure to which He calls us, with all it's risks. Life is an adventure directed by God." -Paul Tournier
Lord, "Teach us to number our [my] days aright, that we [I] may gain a heart of wisdom." (Psalm 90:12). I give to you full contol, Lord. Be honored in that, I pray. Bring me anything that brings You glory.
...Not my will, but yours be done. Amen.

The brave comradeship of God - Oswald Chambers

"Then He took unto Him the twelve." Luke 18:31
The bravery of God in trusting us! You say - "But He has been unwise to choose me, because there is nothing in me; I am not of any value." That is why He chose you. As long as you think there is something in you, He cannot choose you because you have ends of your own to serve; but if you have let Him bring you to the end of your self-sufficiency then He can choose you to go with Him to Jerusalem, and that will mean the fulfilment of purposes which He does not discuss with you.
We are apt to say that because a man has natural ability, therefore he will make a good Christian. It is not a question of our equipment but of our poverty, not of what we bring with us, but of what God puts into us; not a question of natural virtues of strength of character, knowledge, and experience - all that is of no avail in this matter. The only thing that avails is that we are taken up into the big compelling of God and made His comrades (cf. 1 Cor. 1:26-30). The comradeship of God is made up out of men who know their poverty. He can do nothing with the man who thinks that he is of use to God. As Christians we are not out for our own cause at all, we are out for the cause of God, which can never be our cause. We do not know what God is after, but we have to maintain our relationship with Him whatever happens. We must never allow anything to injure our relationship with God; if it does get injured we must take time and get it put right. The main thing about Christianity is not the work we do, but the relationship we maintain and the atmosphere produced by that relationship. That is all God asks us to look after, and it is the one thing that is being continually assailed.

inside

After writing that last entry I have to say that it was hard to hold my attention while reading it, and I wrote it! It was something I hadn't thought much about since I started college quite a long time ago, so revisiting it was intriguing to my thoughts. So, I wrote them down for everyone who cares enough to do so to read those thoughts. If any of you made it all the way through it, good job!
You know, a blog is where we put down our thought, the happenings of the day, anything and everything that we would want to take outside of our head and share with people. So, I don't regret long postings such as the last. If someone wants to get a bit inside another's head, all they have to do is read. What comes out of a person is what is inside. If there is anything good and worthwhile in me it is on account of God, my creator, my savior, my wonderful best friend.